2024 artist book 156 p. 230 x 305 mm Swiss binding
Munken Pure Rough 120 g/m² Silka Mono
Kunst- und Buchdruckerei Kessler, Weimar Buchbinderei Steinhagen, Weimar
The project was under the supervision of Pio Rahner & Marcel Saidov in cooperation with Zentrum für Künstlerpublikationen (Bremen) and was supported by the Kreativfonds of Bauhaus-Universität Weimar as part of the course "Bücher über Bücher".
“Es ist
schwer, die richtigen Worte zu finden: 92 Schreiben anlässlich eines Trauerfalls” (It is hard to find the right words: 92 letters of a death in the family) is an artist publication about
compassionate grief. It re-contextualises the process of correspondence
with condolence mail from the perspective of an autistic grieving
recipient revisiting old writings, seeking to re-evaluate them. In this,
it follows two questions: What are the words used to communicate
compassionate grief in a specific case? How are the words packaged
visually?
To this end and following a wish for order in an array
of disorderly items, wishing to bring comfort in clear structure, 91
transcripts of mail from a close death in my family are broken down into
structural text parts which are sorted, distilling it to leave in only
dominant words and phrases, fragments just big enough to make out a
message, fleeting as if skimmed over. This is followed by grids of all
cards and envelopes sent.
Until now a dissection rather than a
conversation with a deeply emotional subject, the publication is closed
by a 92nd (and last) letter written during the assembly of the book by
me to my younger self during the time of receiving all mail presented
before. Moving the book away from an intellectual exercise, this last
chapter articulates the fundamental purpose of the book: to express
confusion about the nature of these correspondences as an autistic
person as well as an expression of empathy and reconciliation to oneself
as a person inexperienced with the responsibilities of grief, autistic
or not.